Reviving Archaic Words for Modern Times
The crew plays a word guessing game featuring hilariously obscure old-timey vocabulary. From 'crappulous' (drunk and sick) to 'chuckaboo' (close friend) to 'groke' (staring at someone's food), they debate which forgotten words deserve a comeback. Tad wins the competition, earning bragging rights for knowing 'nibbling' (non-gendered niece/nephew term).
Political Commentary: Department of War & Presidential Health
The hosts dissect the rebranding of the Department of Defense back to Department of War, noting the irony of a supposedly anti-war president. They speculate about the current administration's health, citing suspicious hand markings and constant golfing vacations while claiming to have 'ended' multiple wars—though they can't actually name a single one.
Octopus Anatomy & Bestiality Legality
A deep (uncomfortable) dive into whether humans can have sex with octopuses. After Googling octopus beak anatomy and learning about their parrot-like mouthparts, the consensus is a hard no—both due to consent issues and the razor-like chitinous beak structure that would cause significant damage.
Information Overload & Emotional Numbing
The hosts grapple with 'flooding the zone'—the overwhelming deluge of constant bad news that creates emotional paralysis. They discuss how when bombarded with relentless negativity, even good things feel meaningless, and how the human brain simply shuts down in self-defense.
Podcast as Permanent Legacy
In a darkly existential closer, the crew realizes their podcast may be the most permanent record of their existence. They contemplate whether this show will become a 'cult classic' discovered by hipsters 50 years hence, and acknowledge the depressing reality that long-term, all memory dies and the internet may be humanity's only lasting trace.
I don't want to have sex with an animal. I just want to know... Would it be awesome? That's all I want to know. Would it feel awesome? I don't want to do it. I will never know nor experience this.← All episode posts